Down 20 Feel Like A Mess

Sometimes I just feel like a mess, today is one of those days where my actuality matches up with my feelings. It is so hard for me to stay motivated. That is why I can never commit to things like this blog, when I literally have to put things like...

-Wake up
-Take a Shower
-Say I Love You

on my mental priorities list, well you can tell how base line I am feeling.

In other news It turns out I lost around 20 pounds this summer. I have been wavering back and fourth between loosing another 10 since I got home. I know I need to commit to my Yoga practice and things will fall into line, but I got so strong this summer and I have lost so much since I got home that it feels discouraging to start again.

I hope someday I will be able to see a turn around here, a place where I became more happy and hopeful, I hope to see a day where I can commit to writing enough to really help people by sharing my life.

If you meet assholes all day...

Recently I started wondering if I was the asshole... for the last 12 months or so I had always had someone who was bothering me in my life. Maybe it was the awful girl from field school who needless snapped at me, yelled at me or called me a bitch. Or it was a hopelessly incompetent roommate whose attempts at "homemaking" always turned sour. But those are stories for another time. Currently it is my internship room mate, who seems to have little regard for what I consider common courtesy. But the common factor here is me and I have to face that.

Do I honestly think I am the problem in these situations? I don't know. In two out of the three situations I have confronted the person and they have basically refused to modify their behavior when I have offered to modify mine. In all situations I have other people complain to me about the person. But my mom recently pointed out to me that I always have a problem with someone in my life.

Not that I am a drama queen, but there does always seem to be something or rather someone to complain about.